I got a request from some fellow readers to do some stuff on Chuck Norris. No one really knows why Chuck Norris is so awesome... but there are many things that are cool about Chuck Norris. Here are some facts about Chuck Norris that you may of not known. Chuck Norris was on the t.v. show "Walker, Texas Ranger." Many people may know Chuck as a t.v. or movie star, but before that he was a martial arts star. He was undefeated in his carrer of martial arts. Now, here are some of my favorite Chuck Norris jokes.
1. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
2. Some people wear Superman pajamas, Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
3. Kids play kick the can, Chuck Norris plays kick the keg.
4. Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
5. Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
6. Chuck Norris once ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
7. Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
8. A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.
9. Chuck Norris' first job was as a paperboy. There were no survivors.
10. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Those were ten of my favorite Chuck Norris jokes. If you have better Chuck Norris jokes, please leave a comment and tell me you favorites.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Chuck Norris
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8 comments:
1. Chick Norris has no "Ctrl" button because Chuck Norris is always in control.
2.Chuck Norris fought against Bruce lee Chuck Norris cut Bruce lee in half. now there's Jackie Chan And Jet Li.
3. Chuck Norris got in touch with his feminine side and promptly got her pregnant.
4. Chuck Norris can jump start a car using jumper cables attached to his nipples.
5. The crossing lights in Chuck Norris' home town say 'Die slowly' and 'Die quickly'. They each have a picture of Chuck Norris punching or kicking a pedestrian.
Hey Guy. Sweet blog. I don't have any Chuck Norris. Those ones were funny though. I hope you do another blog with more Chuck Norris jokes. They are really funny. Nice job on your blog Guy.
WOW GUY... That was pretty interesting. Ha do you just look up random chuck norris jokes? I think this is probably my favorite entry... :P This was stryder (if you didnt know).
Hey guy. Chuck norris is awsome. I have heard some really funny things about him. Is he your idle. Well keep up the work.
I WAS TOTALLY SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU WHEN YOU WERE LOOKING ALL THESE UP. Definitely one of the funniest things ever. Too bad we got in trouble =[ all of those silly children flocking around our computers. Keep it up G Dawg.
Scarlet
Mike Schaaf Blog Comment
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
Chuck norris doesn't cry,his eyes sweat.
Wow Guy love the blog. Frikkend Hilariuos.
heha i love it
Hi Guy. This is a nice blog. I love those Chuck Norris jokes. My favorite Chuck Norris joke is, The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears. I will see you at school.
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